Coworker Crush: The Ultimate Don’t

This outfit is adorable. But not at work. Resist the urge to drop your pen in front of the copier.

This outfit is adorable. But not at work. Resist the urge to drop your pen in front of the copier.

Having a crush on a coworker can make day-to-day life less monotonous, but in reality it’s the worst thing in the professional world. The. Worst.Thing. Ever. I get it… Once you leave college, you can’t just walk into a basketball game or a party and meet a whole bunch of single, potentially like minded people at once (that’s what bars are for). It’s also fun and exciting to have those butterflies. But acting on your crush can introduce a whole heap of problems. Office romances can work out, and some of them actually do. For most of us, they just do more damage than good. Here’s how.

You can’t concentrate on work

Your boss hired a poised, confident person with the potential to kick ass and do a great job. Once you develop a work crush, your performance inevitably suffers. While you once toiled away double checking your work before turning it in before deadline, your days are now filled coming up with creative ways to “bump into” your crush. You watch his routine. You happen to go to the coffee shop/break room/copier when you know he’ll be there. All of this time spent calculating seriously deflates your productivity.

You stop dressing well

There is an old adage that states, “Dress for the job you want, not the job you have.” If you aspire to occupy the corner office one day, people will need to take you seriously. When you started the job, you came looking sharp on a daily basis. Once you developed your crush, however, you started thinking of ways to enhance your assets to get dreamboat to notice you. You wear push up bras over blouses that are a skoach too small, or you wear skirts that are questionable in relation to the dress code. I know Bridget Jones got the boss by wearing a micro mini and a see through top. But everybody who has the power to get you to the corporate office will see through your little game.

You are tempted to make poor decisions

So not every woman who develops an office crush will automatically revert to junior high school puppy love behavior. Some of us manage to keep it cool at the office and keep it under wraps. Harmless crushes are fine, but if you’re falling over the edge, the temptation to do something stupid can be overwhelming. This temptation is amplified by 90 billion once alcohol is introduced. Think about it… One too many margaritas at the company holiday party and you may find yourself leaving inappropriate messages on your crush’s voicemail. Having a few glasses of wine on a business trip with said coworker could lead to serious foot in mouth disease. At best it’s humiliating. At worst, you could get fired and slapped with a harassment suit.

As I said before, some office romances do work out. The key to these office romances is discretion. Even if you work in an office at which relationships with coworkers are not frowned upon, it’s still unprofessional to bring your personal business into the office. Think about it… None of your coworkers would appreciate you fooling around on their desk. They also don’t want to listen to your drama when they’re trying to get shit done. If you must indulge in an office tryst, keep it outside. Don’t let it interfere with your work. Or just compartmentalize your life and meet your significant other somewhere else. There are plenty of fish in the sea. Unless you’re in Wyoming. Nobody lives there.

 

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